It's snowing furiously outside. I'll have to go back out tonight to accompany a choir/orchestra concert, and am hoping I get all the page turns right and remember to pause after a certain introduction. But overall, it should be pretty stress-free and fun.
Just wanted to jot down a new thought: what if I don't have to make use of every opportunity that comes my way? What if some are purely for enriching my life and can be left undeveloped?
This seems rather obvious, but as I often sorely need the obvious restated, I'll plunge ahead.
I had the opportunity of substitute teaching for a friend, the band teacher where I interned for choir. It was strange going back to the school again, and I was very nervous about subbing.
But after a few brief moments of panic, I found the music folders and things unfolded well. I remembered more students than I thought I would, and they were all cooperative (mostly. very mostly). We went through different songs while I conducted and tried to bring people in. It was near their concert, and so other than keeping the percussion and everybody else together and changing tempos, they didn't need much help.
I just felt lucky to be able to be a part of it.
That day as I was talking to a friend, she mentioned that I had taken those music ed. technique classes in college, and would I take a band teacher position.
My first reaction was, "are you CRAZY?"
But then, I think I could do it. It wouldn't be very pretty at first, and would take a ton of work. But in, say, a beginning program, it could work.
That night I went to Revival Town (hooray! It's pretty much my favorite time of week), and it was a wonderful time of worship and had a real emphasis on God's love, and living fundamentally from an identity of God's beloved. Which is what God has been emphasizing to me for years and years and years, and which is a posture I so often slip out of.
It always bugs me when people say, "Well, God is a God of love, but He's also a God of justice."
When did those become mutually exclusive?
Where is justice without love? Love is the thesis, the structure in which all resides.
ANYHOW I was thinking, during the prayer meeting, about how I was filled today by middle school band music. Who would have thought?
My next thought was, "What do I do with that?" What should I do with that?
And I felt that maybe God, or maybe just me, thought, "Why should I have to do anything with it? What if I never direct band again, and don't have to worry about remembering if a trumpet is a P5 above or below C? What if that was just something to bless me, for my joy?"
and I liked that idea.
GOD never wastes anything, but I don't think I have to worry about using all the little bits of my life to their fullest advantage. God can work them in.
peace be still.